Apr 21, 2011
On our wedding day, a huge thunderstorm swept in just after we had said our vows. So, our reception was spent crammed into a beautiful room having a crazy dance party while the storm raged outside.
A gentlemen that my husband had grown up with in Botswana reminded him that, in Africa, rain is considered the ultimate sign of blessing and prosperity.
It was almost overwhelming to me in that moment because I had childishly prayed, "Lord, for my wedding gift, I'd like a sunny day for my ceremony and a thunderstorm for my reception."
And, just after we were married outside in the beautiful sunny weather, clouds began to roll over the green hills that surrounded our little hilltop villa, the breeze became cool and wet while we posed for pictures, and rain began to fall just as we all rushed into the reception room.
I still remember dancing my heart out in my wedding gown in the candle-lit room as it was occasionally lit up from the crazy flashes of lightning outside.
We were basically kicked out of the venue because of the increasingly bad weather, and even though it was our wedding night, we longed to stay. We knew it was such a momentous, meaningful, never-to-happen-again night and we were hesitant to let it be over.
Even my memories of driving away are filled with splashing water, wet mud ("just married" was smeared in dirt on our going-away car, lol), thunder and lightning.
And even though I completely realize how sentimental I am today, I can't help but feel a connection between today and our wedding day.
The dry, warm day being interrupted by a sudden, cool storm... all of the tender, new growth of Spring being happily soaked in the nutritious blessing of rain. Everything is so intense and electrifying for such a quick time, and then eventually the clouds part and it is over.
It almost never rains long enough, in my opinion.
Our wedding day was obviously a fresh start, and I felt like the storm was such a comforting picture of God's provision and promise of blessing on our life together.
And, in a way, I feel the same kind of "fresh start" today after hearing the news of my husband's internship this summer.
We have struggled, more than just financially, ever since he was laid off from his first career.
You could call it a valley, you could call it darkness, you could call it a dry spell. God never abandoned us, he continued to feed us manna even in the desert, but we sometimes wondered where in the world we were headed and what the purpose of our whole journey was supposed to be.
I'll confess that we were much like the Israelites, because even as we have seen God guiding us and feeding us daily, we still longed for mighty works, for a promised land.
I will also confess that I am constantly repenting of comparing myself to other young families, feeling like we are so far behind, wondering when we're going to "get there" and not be in transition anymore.
But God keeps silencing my anxiety, saying, "You don't even know where "there" is, and if you did, you wouldn't want it. I'm not taking you there, anyways, you're headed somewhere else altogether."
I recently told a good friend of mine how conflicted I felt in my prayers about this internship. How its hard to pray expectantly and in faith for some big blessing when I've almost grown accustomed to struggling though plans not working out the way we think they should.
"I've gotten into this 'endurance-mindset'," I had told her, "I've gotten good at being content in tough situations, I don't know how I would even handle something like this really happening."
So when my husband told me today that he had been chosen out of thousands of other applicants to intern with this amazingly solid and reputable company, the internship of his dreams, I can't help but be overwhelmed... and feel like this is something more special than we even realize.
This is one of the first times in years that we have known that something really good is just around the corner.
We are not waiting anxiously to see whats going to happen this summer, we know that (God-willing these plans happen like we're expecting) his entire summer has been blessed - not just with provision, but with abounding goodness and favor.
And we also know that, even when the internship is over, it should still continue to benefit his resume and future career.
Its just a really big deal, in so many ways.
And even though I would never want to minimize the sweet dependence we've found on the Lord as he has tenderly led us through tough and sometimes confusing times, I also acknowledge the uniqueness of this particular blessing.
So, when my husband walked proudly and confidently away to a test that he didn't even study for due to excitement, I felt such gratitude for a light that was shining a little further down the path than we're used to.
Its unusual and incredible to begin to see pieces coming together.
I am thankful for the reassurance that God is and has been doing mighty things, and that he is so faithful to all the promises of blessing that I felt sure of on our wedding day.
Even as I write this, I've been watching the downpour totally drenching our little yard and... just as I finish... its over.